This picture barely does justice to the incredibly gorgeous sky on Wednesday evening as I rode my bike home along the ocean. But I had to snap it to have some record of the hue of orange that I saw cuddling with the Santa Monica Mountains. I'm so blessed right now to have the opportunity to commute along a 10 mile path from my home to Manhattan Beach where I'm teaching at the incredible Yoga Loft. My ride is invigorating and all 10 miles are along the Pacific Ocean. The views are stunning to say the least.
I came back home to LA from a beautiful and fruitful teaching trip to NYC and could feel the shifts of energy in myself and in others as we moved into the full moon. I felt a sense of inspiration overcome me when I returned, and yet only a few days later a familiar heaviness returned. This heaviness was the same kind of weight I had felt earlier this summer and I noticed my students were having a more difficult time moving. It felt like I was a motivational coach of some type trying to get them to move. While the summer can be a wonderful time for expansion it can also be oppressive. Humidity drags the body through the mud and we tend to over extend ourselves and do our best to push through even when we're tired. Deep nurturing self care, like hot baths, restorative yoga, movie nights, etc, takes a step to the side during the summer. Regardless I was feeling this heaviness in particular on Wednesday. I had just taught a class full of amazing students who really got the work and I was joyful riding back seeing the sun set on the ocean. Suddenly my father came to mind....
Ever since my Dad passed away unexpectedly in his sleep in September I have wanted nothing more than a big huge fat sign from him letting me know he was still with me. Being a spiritual person I was hoping for lights to turn on and off, for the tv to randomly change channels, or for him to show up in person during a deep meditation. I realized some of the weight upon me was this disconnect I have felt from his presence over the past months. As I rode my bike earlier in the day I remembered thinking how sad it was that he would never be able to ride this exact trail, something I would have definitely done with him because he would have loved it. On my way home I rounded the corner and suddenly "Dream Weaver" came onto my random shuffle on my spotify...I was quiet and realized my Dad was speaking to me.
I felt a peace overcome my entire being in a way I had never felt before. I looked out at the ocean, the sky, the sail boats, the palm trees beginning to look like shadows and felt my Dad's presence...I felt his spirit say "I have helped paint this sky for you...I'm here...I'm in these trees, I'm in the water, I'm the orange hue in the sky as the sun is setting, I'm giving you this breeze.......now how are you painting your sky?" I laughed and then I cried...realizing "Dream Weaver" was a song I used to hear in the car with him when he would drive me to piano lessons as a kid. I laughed as I realized he was free....he was happy...he was bigger than I could even comprehend...and he finally in a subtle way got through to me.
I stopped my bike and stared out at the water. Realizing that yes of course my Dad had helped give me this gift. I felt him with me. But he also reminded me that we all paint the sky together. He lifted my eyes out of a heaviness that evening to see what was around me...to suddenly see the sky open up in majestic colors....to feel the wind as I rounded the corner...I was able to receive this and fill in the colors from the palette he laid out for me. It was really a humbling moment for me. In my inspiration...
I'm asking us to make the inquiry....
How am I painting my sky?
How am I coloring in the details of my life? Can we together begin to co create a better place? How can we begin to change the painting of our lives?
I hear people say that they do yoga to clear the mind. I actually think clearing the mind is an impossible task--and I'd love for you to consider letting go of this idea of clearing the mind as something to attain. I also don't understand why we would choose to be in this human experience and want to totally clear our minds! We are here to experience, live, breathe....and that experience means ALL the stuff...good and "bad."
I'm thinking of my practice lately as a place to ORGANIZE the mind, rather than clear. I've finally given myself the space to sit back and look at everything and make sense of it. It's like sitting down once a week and going through your finances and checking in and moving things around and getting a clear picture of where you are. This is how I'm finding my practice to be useful to me these days. Sometimes I figure big things out. If I honor my practice and give myself the space I am actually able to SEE the way in which I color my world...the way I create everything around me. It's not always pretty. I see how I'm in my way...I see how I doubt myself...I see how I judge myself and others...I see how I resist the unknown...I see...I see...I see...and what a gift to see. Seeing and knowing are CLARITY. With clarity we get to take in this amazing information about ourselves and then put ourselves through the fire of change.
Can we look together at how we are painting our lives? Can we change the way we are creating our own worlds and allow that to melt together as co creation with our fellow human beings? Can we set aside our differences and begin to live our lives fully while respecting and honoring one another? How will we paint the sky together?
Let's create together and support one another in this amazing and adventure filled life. I support you and your creativity completely! I'd love to hear what you're wanting to manifest or create more of in your life...how do you want to paint your life differently? Feel free to comment below and inspire others!